Thursday, October 27, 2011

Alcohol

Yes as most of you know I enjoy it. Some people have told me I have a problem. Going out to the bars on my weekend is a problem? Fuck you! I am young, single and like to have fun. I can't stand the people who claim "I don't have to drink to have fun". Well that is good for you. As Jim Jefferies said " all your stories end the same 'and then I went home".  Dont pass your judgment on to me. Drinking once a night with friends at the bar isn't a problem, its a great time.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Halloween

Halloween is by far my favorite holiday. Its really just an excuse to get drunk. My favorite thing tho is that all girls pretty much go as the same thing, slut. God bless America.

Oh the picture is what I feel I look like when I Dougie drunk.

snow..

Fuck the snow. People who claim they love the first snow make me sick to my stomach. Everyone from here doesn't know how to drive in it. Yeah I love waking up an hour earlier to clean my car off and let it warm up. The only good thing about snow is snowdays.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Stupid Questions.

Yes it is true there is no such thing a a stupid question. There is however stupid people. My biggest pet peeve is hearing the same question asked over and over again but in a slightly different way hoping that the answer will be different. Pay attention the first time.

Monday, October 24, 2011

This is music?

Can someone please explain to me how dubstep is considered music? Its like the special Olympics of the music industry. Here is an example for you in case you haven't heard this god awful sound.

NBA

Does anyone really care that it is going to be locked out all season? I am a fan but I really don't seem to care. I normally get excited in March. I guess the longer the season the less people are interested. The NBA needs to learn from the NHL. It's been 6 years since that lock out and I am just getting interested again.

Friendly advice for women.

Women remember that dreams and goals are just Satan's way of distracting you from making dinner.

16 and pregnant.

I just caught 16 and pregnant for the first time and I was surprised to find out this show was not about Mexicans.

Bad decisions

Make good stories. Ain't that the truth. 90% of all my great stories are all because of a bad decision.

"I like you but just as a friend..." Warning Rant

Ah yes every guys favorite words, just friends. Let's face it we all have heard that. What it really means is "you're awesome and I really like hanging out with you but I'll never sleep with you." This is also used as an excuse for girls to be able to call/text you 24/7 and hang out with you when ever they want. Basically being in a relationship without any thing sexual. Oh but start talking to some other girl and not giving you that same amount of attention and it's WWIII now. Ladies here is something that may help you understand why guys get so upset when you say that. If a guy asks you to hang out alone with him or is willing to talk to you about things that interest you then 9 times out of 10 he wants to sleep with you (that 1 time usually means he is interested in the same thing you are, penis). Sure guys and girls can be "just friends", hell some of my best friends are females, but guys don't start talking to you to be friends we already have friends.

Pro Choice

I'm an advocate of pro choice just not as much as Casey Anthony.

Great joke and if you went ohhhhh that's how pussies laugh. Here is my all time favorite baby joke.

"You don't know what pain is, you have no idea what pain is until you see your baby drown in the bathtub and you definitely don't know how to wash a baby." - Anthony Jeselnik

Great Idea

"Okay here is a great idea guys, lets shotgun a beer and have a race down the slide" Oh the stupid things that I do when I am drunk. I wish to say that this was truly a great idea but it was not. Not only did I come in 2nd place and spill my beer all over the slide, which will probably start a new generation of kids on the path of alcoholism, but I managed to cut my lip. Here is the photo finish.

Welcome

Over the past several months I have had friends come up and say one of two things to me. "Zach your Facebook posts are hilarious and always make me laugh" or "Zach you post way too much". To those of you who find me funny thanks that is what I am going for. To the rest you're probably not reading this so you can go fuck yourself. (sarcasm is going to be a main attraction in this blog). With that being said and seeing what SirSkillet Lovett has done with his blog ( http://www.sirskillet.blogspot.com/ ) I have decided to start mine. So continue you reading if you have enjoyed my stuff of Facebook. I however will not censor myself like I do on there, just look at my twitter @The_ImBROglio to see what you're in store for. Also if you're easily offended I would stop reading.